Running, Part II: My first 5k

It's now been just over a week since I ran my 5k for the Northwest Hope and Healing Foundation, so this update is terribly overdue. However, school started this week and I have been just a little bit busy; I know you'll all forgive me.

The short version: I ran the entire thing, and my time was 33:05. I wanted to run it in under 33 minutes, but I'm actually fairly pleased; my only official goal was to run the entire time, and I did. I also met my fundraising goal (the one I set less than three weeks before the race) thanks to some wonderful people.

It was a fantastic day.

The long(er) version: I woke up early, before the rest of my family. I threw on my shorts, toasted myself an English muffin, grabbed a banana for later, and headed out the door. Matt and the kids were going to meet me up in West Seattle, because the thought of getting all of us up, fed, dressed, and out the door by seven o'clock was far too stressful. I met Kyanne at the park and ride, and we hit the freeway around 7:15. The parade route would be closed starting at eight -- the race was at nine -- and we wanted to allow plenty of time for parking and registration. (I did, anyway. Kyanne came along because she is a very, very good friend. I'm pretty sure she just wanted to allow plenty of time to get coffee before the race.)

I probably talked my head off and annoyed her to death on the way up there; I was a little wound-up. And inexplicably nervous, which was probably sort of silly; it's not like I was being graded on this run. (Here I have nightmarish flashbacks of running the mile in gym class.) Anyway, I was all, "I secretly LOVE being out this early on weekend mornings! There's no traffic! It's so quiet!" And because Kyanne is a very good -- and generally very tolerant -- friend, she did not throw me out of her car and go back home to her warm bed.

We parked a couple of blocks from the waterfront. A few people were heading the same direction we were, and I immediately began sizing up the competition. (I know, it's not a competition, blah blah blah.) We wound up walking behind a group of fit looking girls with cute little pony tails and running clothes, and I think this was the point at which I turned to Kyanne and started bitching about how I don't have "good running hair." (I know. I sometimes can't imagine why she's friends with me. I think she asked me what "good running hair" even meant, and I was all, "UUNNHHH!")

We hunkered down at the Alki Bakery, which, blessedly, was right next to the starting line. Bliss! We could sit inside and stay warm right up until the race started. Our friend Becca met us there -- she hopped off the bus shortly before eight, right in front of the coffee shop -- and the three of us spent a pleasant, relaxing hour waiting for the race to begin.

...Except that's a lie. I'm sure Kyanne and Becca would have enjoyed a pleasant, relaxing hour, but I basically ruined their coffee/pastry time by talking a mile a minute and alternating between such reasonable things as, "I am going to be so depressed if I'm, like, the slowest runner" and "Those people clustering over by the starting line better WATCH OUT, because I am NOT going to be stuck behind anyone!" At some point I noticed all these hyper-looking skinny Runner Types jogging frenetically back and forth in the street.

"Why are they DOING THAT?" I demanded. "They are making me antsy."

"They're just warming up," Kyanne said. "They have no body fat." (Wow. Poor them.)

"Should I be warming up?" I said. "I don't really know how this works. I already ate a banana because my friend Julia is a REAL runner and she said that's what she does before a race. But -- should I be out there? Running around?"

Kyanne very patiently explained that "those" people are the ones who do all the races and they are Serious Runners. (We all know I am a "runner," not a Serious Runner.) I relaxed marginally, only to be set off by millions of other dumb little things for the next hour. I don't even remember what, but at one point Kyanne did have to say, "Shari, you need to reign in the crazy." And I hadn't even had coffee.

Shortly before nine, we noticed people clustering around the starting line in the middle of the street, so we went out to join them. Kyanne and Becca were walking together, but they very kindly hung out with me (I lined up with the "joggers") until the horn blew to signal the start of the race. I had never in my life been so excited to run; the adrenalin was surging and I hadn't even started.

I started my music -- I start all my runs listening to Lady Gaga these days -- and started jogging. Except the crowd was moving so slowly at first; I immediately tried to weave in between people so I could actually run and not just sort of bounce up and down in more or less the same place. I'm pretty sure I heard either Kyanne or Becca call after me, "Use your hallway elbows!" (You know what I mean if you teach in a crowded high school.) It took approximately one minute for me to make it to the actual starting line, and by that time, there was enough room to run.

I don't know if I can accurately describe the sheer elation that took over at that point. I had initially been worried about trying to run too fast in the beginning and getting tired later on, but I settled into a comfortable pace right away. The route took us right along the waterfront with a beautiful view of the Seattle skyline; the morning was gray and cool and felt absolutely perfect for a run.

The first half was effortless. I was flying. Not necessarily in terms of speed, although I quickly passed basically the entire "jogging" group (note to self: Next time, you can line up with the runners!) and I'm pretty sure none of them passed me again; it was, simply, one of the most exhilarating things I've ever experienced. Running with this huge group of people was incredibly energizing and inspiring. Almost immediately I began to notice people in a way I hadn't been able to do prior to the start of the race. I saw a family running together -- at least I assume they were a family -- wearing the same t-shirt with a woman's face and her name on the front. (Most of us wore the race shirts, but several teams wore their own customized shirts.) I saw countless people wearing pins bearing names and images of women they loved, women who have battled breast cancer. There were people -- adults, children, families -- lined up along the street, cheering. Some held signs. The power of that, and of all that collective motion, was immense.

I teared up several times during the first half-mile or so. I thought about my friend Dori, about my friend V's mother, about all the people who have shared their stories with me -- when you tell people you're running for breast cancer, or probably for anything, really, you're blessed with these stories if you take the time to listen. I thought about all the women who inspired a thousand runners to take to the street on a cool late-summer morning, and I'm telling you this: I didn't have to worry about my legs or my lungs or whether I'd chosen the right music, because I was carried on the wave of those stories, along with everyone else. It might sound dramatic, but it was one of the most profound moments of my life -- to recognize and honor the interconnectedness of people who share these stories. I mean, this is at the heart of why I read and write at all -- I tell my students all the time that it's about reminding ourselves of our humanity. It occurred to me last Sunday that I was running for the same reason.

The route returned along the sidewalk down the same street, so the people who reached the halfway point would be running back in the direction from which they came. This meant that as people turned around they were facing us, and as the first (impressively fast) runners turned and passed us, those of us still heading for the turnaround point burst into cheers.

When it was my turn to pass the halfway mark, I was excited to see people (and several little kids, which I just loved) holding out cups of water for us to grab as we ran by. Now, okay. I'm all proud of myself for running this race, but I actually jog at least three miles a couple of times a week, and I do not generally need water halfway through. However, I really wanted this to be as AUTHENTIC AS POSSIBLE, which meant that because it was a REAL RACE, I thought I should definitely grab a cup of water and chug it without stopping. Hello, validation! However, it turns out that gulping water while running requires more coordination than I was prepared for, so I wound up tossing the entire cup directly onto my chest. I might have caught a stray drop or two on my tongue, since my mouth was wide open. I really hope none of the onlookers with cameras caught that dignified little moment on film.

I started to feel a little tired probably around mile 2, but then I saw one of the little runner girls that had walked to the race just ahead of Kyanne and me. I was suddenly filled with the insatiable need to pass her (hello, more validation, even if it's only in my head! Where lots of things are!), so I picked up my pace a bit. I didn't sprint past her, because I wanted to finish ahead of her. I became absolutely fixated on this, which is ridiculous, but it worked, because I found the extra burst of energy I needed. I passed her, and I totally finished ahead of her. YEAH. It would have been so much more satisfying if I could have stopped to explain to her that I was winning, of course, but what can you do.

Seeing the finish line was pretty fabulous, too. Even better: seeing my husband on the other side, holding our children. Suzannah was dressed in capris and a pink sweatshirt and mittens, and Isaac just looked cheerful and gamely interested in all the commotion. Matt didn't manage to snap my picture as I crossed the finish line, but I probably didn't look quite as amazing as I did in my head, so this is really very okay. (I like to preserve the integrity of my fantasies as much as possible, thank you.) We sat inside the bakery and shared a chocolate chip cookie with Suzannah while we waited for Kyanne and Becca to finish. They arrived to find me bouncing up and down and announcing that I felt AWESOME and wanted to do it again RIGHT! THAT! SECOND! I totally could do it, and that would be a 10k! Hey! Wouldn't they like to do a 10k with me?

...No?

(Kyanne and Becca are seriously really good friends. I can't imagine how irritating I must be when I'm feeling that excited.)

The six of us went out for a celebratory brunch at Easy Street Records, where I ate the absolute best breakfast burrito I've ever had and drank one of the best mochas. And then I went home and took one of the most satisfying hot showers of my life. It was a really, really great experience and a wonderful day, and I absolutely want to do it again. My goal for next time is to beat my time. Considering I was the girl who wanted to stay home from school on days when we had to run the mile for gym class, I feel pretty okay about my first one, though.

I have no idea how I can possibly go for runs now without crowds cheering along the street, but I suppose I'll manage.

(Matt did get some pictures, by the way. I'll try to remember to post one or two of them soon.)